Sunday, December 24, 2006
Thursday, December 14, 2006
Just a little thought
A friend of mine (Scavenger from New York) and I were talking about dishonest people (of the psychic & faith-healer type) and the name Jonathan Edward (of Crossing Over infamy) came up.
And a thought came to me.
Have you ever noticed how psychic nut-frauds never tell anyone that in a past life, the person was a petty thief who died while taking a shit? Edward never told anyone that he couldn't make a connection with someone's dead Uncle Dave because Uncle Dave was presently frying in hell for embezzling money and knowingly spreading herpes evenly amongst the secretaries in the typing pool. These fools/victims are always told exactly what they want to hear.
Coincidence?
And a thought came to me.
Have you ever noticed how psychic nut-frauds never tell anyone that in a past life, the person was a petty thief who died while taking a shit? Edward never told anyone that he couldn't make a connection with someone's dead Uncle Dave because Uncle Dave was presently frying in hell for embezzling money and knowingly spreading herpes evenly amongst the secretaries in the typing pool. These fools/victims are always told exactly what they want to hear.
Coincidence?
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
Another Pastor Tearfully Resigns
Another evangelical pastor has resigned after he tearfully admitted that he has struggled with wearing polyester for years.
"From the time I was a baby, I was dressed in polyester. And even after I had come to an age where I knew it was wrong, I still did it. This has been a lifelong struggle for me," said Leroy Williams, pastor of the Levitical Restoration Baptist Church.
Congregational members told reporters that while they may not approve of what Leroy has been wearing, they still love him. "We're going to pray for him, that God would restore him."
Leroy hopes to get counseling at the Single-Fabric Restoration Group, a healing ministry found in an undisclosed location where cotton is still grown "God's way" by unpaid laborers. "We understand his struggles," said Eli Whittenberg, "but we believe God will bless those who follow his Word. But should he not..." He laughed as he pointed to a huge quarry of rocks at the edge of the city. "Let's just say, the fear of God is just one of the motivations we use to keep people from sinning."
~ a tip of my hat to my chum Kyle for writing the article and allowing me to reprint it here.
"From the time I was a baby, I was dressed in polyester. And even after I had come to an age where I knew it was wrong, I still did it. This has been a lifelong struggle for me," said Leroy Williams, pastor of the Levitical Restoration Baptist Church.
Congregational members told reporters that while they may not approve of what Leroy has been wearing, they still love him. "We're going to pray for him, that God would restore him."
Leroy hopes to get counseling at the Single-Fabric Restoration Group, a healing ministry found in an undisclosed location where cotton is still grown "God's way" by unpaid laborers. "We understand his struggles," said Eli Whittenberg, "but we believe God will bless those who follow his Word. But should he not..." He laughed as he pointed to a huge quarry of rocks at the edge of the city. "Let's just say, the fear of God is just one of the motivations we use to keep people from sinning."
~ a tip of my hat to my chum Kyle for writing the article and allowing me to reprint it here.
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
Saturday, November 25, 2006
Buy this DVD
We just finished watching An Inconvenient Truth. When I think of the movies that are playing in theatres right now, when I think of the movies I've seen in theatres myself, I just gotta shake my head. What a relatively shallow, meaningless experience most of them are, and have been, compared to this movie. You have to watch it for yourself. You also have to watch it for your kids and grandkids.
Check this out
then
Order the CD
Just as a side bar, it really is astonishing to think about just how many morons in America it took to keep Al Gore from being President, and to instead put in his place the retarded baboon that is in the White House now.
Saturday, November 11, 2006
That dune looks familiar
I was talking to someone about the Ten Commandments the other day. We were talking about what a terrible choice of things to write about. God only bothered to actually write anything down once, and he chose these? The first 4 are political and the rest are no-brainers that we really don't have to be told.
And then it hit me: if you're dumb enough to follow a guy into the desert where you go in circles for several years, you probably need to be told a lot of things. It's really not a huge desert. Hell, you can walk right across the thing in a few months, without a divine ranger scouting ahead. 40 years? Moses, you're an idiot.*
I can hear Yahweh now...
"Yes, yes, Moses. I'll send the damn manna down in a sec. No, I'm not going to ask this guy on the camel for directions, and if you'd just shut the hell up for a sec, I might be able to get this bloody map folded the right way!"
*maybe not - he managed to tell people with a straight face that his blood-thirsty god, the one who commanded him to kill one of his followers for collecting firewood, is commanding them to "Not kill".
And then it hit me: if you're dumb enough to follow a guy into the desert where you go in circles for several years, you probably need to be told a lot of things. It's really not a huge desert. Hell, you can walk right across the thing in a few months, without a divine ranger scouting ahead. 40 years? Moses, you're an idiot.*
I can hear Yahweh now...
"Yes, yes, Moses. I'll send the damn manna down in a sec. No, I'm not going to ask this guy on the camel for directions, and if you'd just shut the hell up for a sec, I might be able to get this bloody map folded the right way!"
*maybe not - he managed to tell people with a straight face that his blood-thirsty god, the one who commanded him to kill one of his followers for collecting firewood, is commanding them to "Not kill".
Friday, October 27, 2006
Faking it.
"Now, I know this may offend those who suffer from this particular condition, and these individuals might not like it much when I suggest that a certain person with this diagnosis is exaggerating his symptoms, but I have to say, I think Rush Limbaugh is just pretending to be a dick."
Being stupid for political reasons is an American tradition, and in this specific case I'm thankful for that.
TheStar.com - Everyone knows Rush Limbaugh's just faking
In a follow-up interview, Rush stated that he believed that Christopher Reeve's wheel-chair antics were just for show, and he's only pretending to be dead, or at least embellishing his death, for political reasons.
Being stupid for political reasons is an American tradition, and in this specific case I'm thankful for that.
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Smile!
"There's me and... no, that's me there, and ... who was that?... Judy had a stye that day, so that's her on the left, that I know... we'll use Judy to land-mark.... Aunt Betty was taller then, so I think that's her there... no... who the hell was I standing beside?...what shoes were you wearing, Sue?... actually, I wasn't there at all.... that's not us...damn photomat guy gave me the wrong pictures again!"
Friday, October 06, 2006
Thursday, October 05, 2006
An interesting thought
This seems like a very reasonable suggestion.
From an aquaintence of mine in the States:
"Since one of the rallying cries of neo-conservatism is the much beloved TANSTAAFL Principle ("There Ain't No Such Thing As A Free Lunch") I propose that we make society's freeloaders ante up. And one source of much needed revenue might be to tax any and all churches and other religious institutions that even remotely engage in politics. You know: the ones that pound the tub over abortion, stem cell research, prayer in schools, and other issues, while sponsoring votor registration in their lobbies. All the while piously proclaiming that "we're not political because we promote involvement over issues, not candidates". Outfits like "Focus on the Family", "The American Center for Law & Justice", "The Family Research Council", etc., rake in millions annually while telling others how to vote and lobbying elected officials for their pet agendas. Unlike some poor schlub who crosses the Rio Grande illegally to feed his family back in Mexico, these outfits pay NO taxes-- and their funders get a write off.
End the shell game, end the charade. Tax the freeloading occupational religionists- same as we tax any other business enterprise. Protestant, Catholic, Jewish, liberal or conservative, I would not discriminate.
In fact, why not tax ALL churches? After all, Jesus said to "render unto Caesar that which is Caesar's"- that more or less precludes hiding behind tax exempt status. If the church burns down, fireman and policeman- all of whom are supported by taxes- will respond, same as for any home or business. People will still be able to contribute to their church- but if there is no tax advantage behind it, it will really become a test of Christian charity, will it not?"
My suggestion: funnel the tax dollars gathered from churches into caring for all those people who suffer from the illnesses, conditions, and diseases that stem cell research could have helped by now. Sort of a "put your money where your stupidity is" kind of plan.
From an aquaintence of mine in the States:
"Since one of the rallying cries of neo-conservatism is the much beloved TANSTAAFL Principle ("There Ain't No Such Thing As A Free Lunch") I propose that we make society's freeloaders ante up. And one source of much needed revenue might be to tax any and all churches and other religious institutions that even remotely engage in politics. You know: the ones that pound the tub over abortion, stem cell research, prayer in schools, and other issues, while sponsoring votor registration in their lobbies. All the while piously proclaiming that "we're not political because we promote involvement over issues, not candidates". Outfits like "Focus on the Family", "The American Center for Law & Justice", "The Family Research Council", etc., rake in millions annually while telling others how to vote and lobbying elected officials for their pet agendas. Unlike some poor schlub who crosses the Rio Grande illegally to feed his family back in Mexico, these outfits pay NO taxes-- and their funders get a write off.
End the shell game, end the charade. Tax the freeloading occupational religionists- same as we tax any other business enterprise. Protestant, Catholic, Jewish, liberal or conservative, I would not discriminate.
In fact, why not tax ALL churches? After all, Jesus said to "render unto Caesar that which is Caesar's"- that more or less precludes hiding behind tax exempt status. If the church burns down, fireman and policeman- all of whom are supported by taxes- will respond, same as for any home or business. People will still be able to contribute to their church- but if there is no tax advantage behind it, it will really become a test of Christian charity, will it not?"
My suggestion: funnel the tax dollars gathered from churches into caring for all those people who suffer from the illnesses, conditions, and diseases that stem cell research could have helped by now. Sort of a "put your money where your stupidity is" kind of plan.
Friday, September 29, 2006
Letter to a Christian Nation
Sam Harris' follow-up book to The End of Faith is out. Just picked up my copy, and he has delivered on the promises I've heard made about this new release. Unfortunately, the people who need to read this book the most probably won't.
Sam Harris
Sam Harris
Friday, September 08, 2006
Thanks Steve.
Ok. It's been about 4 days and I think it's starting to sink in. I think I can type this now.
Steve Irwin isn't romping about anymore.
I've never seen anyone quite like him. I remember the first time I saw him on the tube about a decade ago. My first reaction was "Honey! Come see what they do to convicts in Australia! They hop them up on speed, then toss them out in the wilds!" By the second commercial break, I was a fan.
He was beyond enthusiasm for what he did. His passion could barely be contained by a picture tube. He actually believed in what he did. Well, who doesn't believe in animal conservation? But he was doing it. He was a unique, often imitated but never duplicated sort of fellow.
Well, speaking for myself, I want to thank you for being you Steve. You did good.
"I'll lay my life on the line to save and protect animals."
- Steve, in a recent interview on Animal Planet.
Steve Robert Irwin.
(1962-2006)
Missing you already, mate.
Steve Irwin isn't romping about anymore.
I've never seen anyone quite like him. I remember the first time I saw him on the tube about a decade ago. My first reaction was "Honey! Come see what they do to convicts in Australia! They hop them up on speed, then toss them out in the wilds!" By the second commercial break, I was a fan.
He was beyond enthusiasm for what he did. His passion could barely be contained by a picture tube. He actually believed in what he did. Well, who doesn't believe in animal conservation? But he was doing it. He was a unique, often imitated but never duplicated sort of fellow.
Well, speaking for myself, I want to thank you for being you Steve. You did good.
"I'll lay my life on the line to save and protect animals."
- Steve, in a recent interview on Animal Planet.
Steve Robert Irwin.
(1962-2006)
Missing you already, mate.
God of the Gaps
To see some arguments that demonstrate the plea to incredulity fallacy to a T, look at one of the sponsoring links google keeps choosing for my blog.
Y-Origins Connection :: Intelligent Design For Everyone
Y-Origins Connection :: Intelligent Design For Everyone
Friday, September 01, 2006
Q-ray Bracelets can hurt you...
...at least, according to the company that peddles them.
These are not magnetic bracelets. Magnet therapy is bullshit. Q-ray uses another line of shit, and it's a yin and yang thing, according to the company's reply to my inquiries.
Now, let's play a little Yin-Yang advocate for a bit.
Yin and Yang, among other things, denote the positive and negative charges in your body, according to this company's R&D Team. (lol) Which is which, I dunno. It doesn't matter. If these two natural forces are present in equal quantities, you're 'balanced' - you'll have good health. And I'm going to speculate that roughly half the population is fairly evenly balanced. I think this is fair. I doubt that more than half of us are suffering from an illness at any given time, and that the average person feels fine at least half of the time.
The bracelets, however, are all 'positively charged', according to the makers. (see where I'm going with this?) So if you're among the half who are not balanced, the assumption is that your positive and negative forces are not equally present. Which force is too high is never suggested. I'm going to claim that it's equally likely that your negatives are too low to your positives being too low. Anyone wanna call me on this, go right ahead. Ok, so far, I've reasoned that 25% of the population are 'negatively challenged', 25% are 'positively challenged' (lol), and the remaining 50% are juuuust right. So, by wearing this bracelet, you have a 25% chance of improving your health, 50% chance of dropping your quality of health somewhat, and a 25% chance of making yourself gravely ill.
Starting to sound like Las Vegas, eh?
These are not magnetic bracelets. Magnet therapy is bullshit. Q-ray uses another line of shit, and it's a yin and yang thing, according to the company's reply to my inquiries.
Now, let's play a little Yin-Yang advocate for a bit.
Yin and Yang, among other things, denote the positive and negative charges in your body, according to this company's R&D Team. (lol) Which is which, I dunno. It doesn't matter. If these two natural forces are present in equal quantities, you're 'balanced' - you'll have good health. And I'm going to speculate that roughly half the population is fairly evenly balanced. I think this is fair. I doubt that more than half of us are suffering from an illness at any given time, and that the average person feels fine at least half of the time.
The bracelets, however, are all 'positively charged', according to the makers. (see where I'm going with this?) So if you're among the half who are not balanced, the assumption is that your positive and negative forces are not equally present. Which force is too high is never suggested. I'm going to claim that it's equally likely that your negatives are too low to your positives being too low. Anyone wanna call me on this, go right ahead. Ok, so far, I've reasoned that 25% of the population are 'negatively challenged', 25% are 'positively challenged' (lol), and the remaining 50% are juuuust right. So, by wearing this bracelet, you have a 25% chance of improving your health, 50% chance of dropping your quality of health somewhat, and a 25% chance of making yourself gravely ill.
Starting to sound like Las Vegas, eh?
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
Pentecostals take idiocy to new heights
There are a few ways to gain and support a believe. A good way is by following where the evidence takes you. Other ways, which are poor, unreliable, or just downright silly, are through tradition, authority, or revelation. Believing something just because your ancestors believed it might be useful for the developmentally-challenged or the lazy, as would be believing something just because someone told you to believe, or because someone sat and thought about something until a special feeling came over them. This is not the pathway to truth. This is why I can't understand what an evangelical Pentacostal follower is doing in a museum in the first place. Someone take a wrong turn?
New rule - you are free to enjoy your self-imposed idiocy and demonstrate just how little you know or care about science by saying things such as "only a theory", but when you get sick, you're not allowed to go to a hospital, a place that just oozes applied science. If you're really sick, go to your church. Let's stop interfering with evolution and let such people start demonstration a bit of continuity. For the sake of our species.
Telegraph | News | Evangelicals urge museum to hide man's ancestors
Saturday, August 05, 2006
Discovery Channel's swan dive into the shitter
Are you freaking kidding me?
The boys and I usually watch documentaries. (If there's no hockey or King of the Hill on.) So we're watching the Discovery Civilization Channel and a show called "Xtreme Mysteries: Dinosaur Extinction" comes on. The narrator said that scientists don't agree on what caused the extinction. One theory was the Impact Event one (which I thought most scientists agreed with), but another "theory" was presented - they were wiped out by the Biblical Flood.
!!!!
Um. What?
Yes, some "scientists" believed that a global flood several thousands of years ago caused the dinosaur extinction. But to back track, the show explained that some scientists believed that man and dinos walked the earth at the same time! The "scientist" they interviewed was..... drum roll please...... Kent Hovind! (I thought he was in jail on federal fraud charges. Musta made bail).
No evidence was provided for either claim, and no scientist was interviewed to provide a rebuttal to the claims. You'd think that a global flood might leave some evidence behind. But no. Nothing was put forth. It was treated as an accepted fact. So The Flood hypothesis was presented as being a contender as an explanation for the dino extinction. I couldn't believe it. I had to spend the next hour explaining to the boys all the mistakes that were made in the show, what science is, and isn't, and how scientists "do" science.
PBS must be the last station left that hasn't replaced integrity with ratings.
Unbelievable.
Check out what other highly-intellectual topics we can expect from this series: link
Crop circles, the Bible predicts 9/11, the power of prayer, who's controlling the weather, who killed Princess Di, the Rapture, were the moon landings faked, and a number of topics of interest to fundamentalist Christians.
Seems the Discovery Channel is interested in becoming a tv version of The National Enquirer. They will be if they keep airing series like this one.
The boys and I usually watch documentaries. (If there's no hockey or King of the Hill on.) So we're watching the Discovery Civilization Channel and a show called "Xtreme Mysteries: Dinosaur Extinction" comes on. The narrator said that scientists don't agree on what caused the extinction. One theory was the Impact Event one (which I thought most scientists agreed with), but another "theory" was presented - they were wiped out by the Biblical Flood.
!!!!
Um. What?
Yes, some "scientists" believed that a global flood several thousands of years ago caused the dinosaur extinction. But to back track, the show explained that some scientists believed that man and dinos walked the earth at the same time! The "scientist" they interviewed was..... drum roll please...... Kent Hovind! (I thought he was in jail on federal fraud charges. Musta made bail).
No evidence was provided for either claim, and no scientist was interviewed to provide a rebuttal to the claims. You'd think that a global flood might leave some evidence behind. But no. Nothing was put forth. It was treated as an accepted fact. So The Flood hypothesis was presented as being a contender as an explanation for the dino extinction. I couldn't believe it. I had to spend the next hour explaining to the boys all the mistakes that were made in the show, what science is, and isn't, and how scientists "do" science.
PBS must be the last station left that hasn't replaced integrity with ratings.
Unbelievable.
Check out what other highly-intellectual topics we can expect from this series: link
Crop circles, the Bible predicts 9/11, the power of prayer, who's controlling the weather, who killed Princess Di, the Rapture, were the moon landings faked, and a number of topics of interest to fundamentalist Christians.
Seems the Discovery Channel is interested in becoming a tv version of The National Enquirer. They will be if they keep airing series like this one.
Tuesday, July 25, 2006
the Afghan joke.
Women back under wraps with Taliban vice squad
"When we talk of 'vice and virtue' ... the one introduced by the Taliban comes to our minds. But it won't be like that," insisted Mohammad Karim Rahimi, a spokesman for the president. "It will be an organisation which will work on promoting morality in society as it exists in any other Islamic country."
Oh great. They're committed to remaining in the stone age. It's time to get our troops the hell out of there before another Canadian dies for nothing.
Friday, July 07, 2006
Serbia Deploys Peacekeeping Forces To U.S.
Serbian president Vojislav Kostunica deployed more than 30,000 peacekeeping troops to the U.S. Monday, pledging full support to the troubled North American nation as it struggles to establish democracy.
Gotta love the Onion.
Thursday, July 06, 2006
I don't know what it is, exactly...
... but there's something not right about a guy who wears his watch on the inside of his wrist.
Beware
The Canadian Cancer Research Group
This company is not to be confused with the Canadian Cancer Society, which is a legitimate organization committed to actually doing research on cancer treatments. The CCRG is a business committed to ripping off people when they're at their most vulnerable point in life, and they've even been known to tell people to stop legitimate treatments. They lie to hopeful & desperate people, and because the guy running it is a computer guy and not a doctor guy, the Canadian government says they can't regulate them.
A good think to remember is that there is no such thing as "alternative medicine". Either a medicine passes testing that uses controlled double-blind studies or it doesn't. If an "alternative medicine" passes the testing procedure, it's no longer "alternative medicine". It's medicine.
Tuesday, July 04, 2006
The opposite of good is not evil
It's complacency. Case in point - our laws concerning pot. If these laws are good ones, why do most people refuse to debate, or even discuss them with me? And of those who are willing to engage me, why do they get their asses so severely kicked while I don't even break a sweat? It's simple. So simple, even my kids understand it. The drug laws are bad. Very bad. Do you have a taste for irony? Here you go - the people who are hurt the most by our drug laws are the non-toking taxpayer. Unfortunately, they're either too stupid regarding the facts, or they just don't care (they're stupid in general). Yes, I'm talking about you. The guy who hid his face in shame and guilt when I challenged you in the Peterborough Examiner to a debate. You all hid. Not a single one of you had the balls or the strength of character or personal integrity to support your law in public.
I wish my dad's generation was more responsible. And more accountable. They shouldn't have lied. Lying is wrong. Even lying to kids. Especially lying to kids. As adults and parents, they should have known that. And now I not only have to take care of them, I have to clean this mess they've made without them even offering to help.
Shameful. Now my brother-in-law, a cop and all-round good guy, has to risk his life defending your stupidity and total disregard for personal responsibility.
Never underestimate the stupidity of people in crowds, eh?
I wish my dad's generation was more responsible. And more accountable. They shouldn't have lied. Lying is wrong. Even lying to kids. Especially lying to kids. As adults and parents, they should have known that. And now I not only have to take care of them, I have to clean this mess they've made without them even offering to help.
Shameful. Now my brother-in-law, a cop and all-round good guy, has to risk his life defending your stupidity and total disregard for personal responsibility.
Never underestimate the stupidity of people in crowds, eh?
Sunday, July 02, 2006
Can two wrongs make a right?
Let's say you were talking to a guy, and this guy had not one lazy eye but two. Do you think it would show? Would you be able to figure it out, or would you keep looking over your shoulder?
I'm not making this up.
I noticed that there's braille on the keypad at the bank machine. Yes, I'm all for handicapped access and all that good stuff, but this bank machine is a drive through!
I swear, I'm not making this up.
I swear, I'm not making this up.
But it's not a sport!
Curling and golf might be fun games for some, but can we stop referring to them as "sports"? See, by doing so, it is implied that those engaged in the activity are "athletes". My buddy Greg Shanner from high school was a curler, and a damn good one. For those of you who have met Greg, I rest my case.
Stupid sayings
I don't know the origins of some of our sayings, but I wish I did.
"Selling like hotcakes." - I assume these are pancakes. Have you ever seen someone running a pancake stand downtown? If you did, was there a big line-up?
"Sleeping like a baby" - obviously coined by someone who doesn't have kids. "I slept like a baby last night. I only slept for a few hours at a stretch, and when I did wake for the final time this morning, there was an empty bottle beside me, I had no idea where I was or what my next move was gonna be, and there was crap in my underwear."
"Selling like hotcakes." - I assume these are pancakes. Have you ever seen someone running a pancake stand downtown? If you did, was there a big line-up?
"Sleeping like a baby" - obviously coined by someone who doesn't have kids. "I slept like a baby last night. I only slept for a few hours at a stretch, and when I did wake for the final time this morning, there was an empty bottle beside me, I had no idea where I was or what my next move was gonna be, and there was crap in my underwear."
You've gotta be kidding me.
So I'm sitting there, minding my own business (as I've been known to do) and the guy beside me pulls out a cloth rag from his pocket, empties the upper contents of his sinuses into the cloth, then puts it back in his pocket! Has his 1940's flash-frozen body been recently thawed out? Am I on Candid Camera? Does he work for a Just For Laughs camera crew? I dunno but someone, on behalf of whomever does his laundry, needed to tell him that we have these neat little inventions called tissues now. Here. Try these. Use them two at a time. Take some with you for later, Mr. Mucous. They're made of paper pulp. They actually do grow on trees!
Saturday, July 01, 2006
I used to say that?
So I'm looking over the Lord's Prayer (one of the nice things about ADD is that you're never really bored) and I come to the line that reads "...and lead us not into temptation."
Isn't that an odd request?
Isn't that an odd request?
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