Talking to Muslims.

Here's an exchange on a discussion board that was kinda fun. Well, for me at least. A Muslim poster was citing all the reasons why Muslim women had it so good. His post is in green. My response follows. Enjoy:

QUOTE decent-lord:Following are some rights, which Muslim women have!

1. The RIGHT and duty to acquire education.

2. The RIGHT to have her own independent property.

3. The RIGHT to work [job or business] to earn money, which she keeps it.

4. The RIGHT to equal reward for equal deed and/or work.

5. The RIGHT to express her opinion.

6. The RIGHT to argue and/or advocate her cause or opinion to be heard.

7. The RIGHT to vote since 1,421 years.

8. The RIGHT to provisions from her husband for all her needs and more.

9. The RIGHT to negotiate marriage terms of her choice.

10.The RIGHT to obtain divorce from her husband, even on the grounds that she simply don't like him. In Islaam divorce is suppose to be last resort.

11.The RIGHT to keep all her own money. [She is not responsible for maintenance of family].

12.The RIGHT to get sexual satisfaction from her husband.

13.The RIGHT to get custody of her children in case of divorce [unless she is unable to raise them for valid reasons]

14.The RIGHT to choose husband of her choice.

15.The RIGHT to refuse a proposed and/or arranged marriage.

16. The RIGHT to re-marry after divorce or after becoming widow.

- Even when they are menstruating, on special days, like the two Eid festivals, they are still allowed to come to the Eid prayers, and menstruating women can take part in most of the actions of the Hajj pilgrimage.

Name any other religion, political theory, or philosophy which offers such a comprehensiveness to women by giving her total control of her life and affairs???
NONE

end QUOTE

Let's take a look, shall we?

you said: "- Even when they are menstruating, on special days, like the two Eid festivals, they are still allowed to come to the Eid prayers, and menstruating women can take part in most of the actions of the Hajj pilgrimage. "

Big deal. Would someone actually check them as they entered? What actions of the Hajj can't they take part in if they have their period? The horseback riding and the syncronized swimming?

you said: "Name any other religion, political theory, or philosophy which offers such a comprehensiveness to women by giving her total control of her life and affairs ??? NONE"

Yep. None. Oh, except for the ones employed by that little group, known as The West. You may of heard of it. It's been in all the papers.

In the Qur'an, it says one man witness is worth two women witnesses (2:282). I dunno why.

Well, now that I think about it.... seems to me that two girls together would be able to pay attention to things around them less than if they were alone. You know how they like to yak and giggle amongst themselves. Ok, so this one makes sense.

What, exactly, is "lewdness"? It must be bad, because if a woman is found to be guilty of lewdness, she's to be placed under house arrest for the rest of her life. What the penalty of lewdness for a male is, I dunno. He becomes a busboy at Red Lobster? (man, that guy was rude).

I guess it's good that you can't inherit a woman. Unless she's lewd! Man, there it is again. (4:19) Who the heck would want her anyways? It's not like she can leave the dang house ever again.

The next verse is important 'cause it lays out the rules for exchanging wives. Now there's something the Hindus never thought of! Backwards Hindus. They must hate their wives.

Then there's the part about not being able to have sex with a married woman unless she's a captive/spoil of war. (4:24) This only makes sense on the surface because she'll probably end up being lewd. Then your troubles really start, Abdul.

The instructions in (4:34) are exceptionally useful. It explains how Allah (pb&j) made men to be in charge of women, but the useful part is how you're to punish the bad woman - you don't sleep with her. That'll learn her! Become the penis nazi. "No Johnson for you!" She'll quickly lose that rebellious streak.

Then there's the practical instructions on how to clean yourself if you've touched a woman found in (4:43). You can't go to prayer if you're drunk, dirty, or have touched a woman. We all know that. But here's a helpful household tip: if you don't have any water, you can always wash yourself in clean dirt. I think I saw this bit on the Martha Stewart Show once. Mmmm... clean dirt... available in Spring Mould scent or Original Dusty.

I must mention, however, that a Muslim poster once pointed out that I was silly to mention this passage, since "touch" meant "have sex with". I dunno... rubbing dirt on my wee wee just doesn't leave me with that all-day fresh feeling. Maybe Mr. Happy is just extra dirty. Hey, maybe she was a lewd one!

(24:4) tells us that if you want to accuse a woman of adultery, you gotta bring 4 witnesses.

"pssst... meet you in our usual place at midnight. My husband will be asleep"

"Ok. Can my friends watch?"

"Yeah, but only 3. I may be lewd, but I'm not stupid".